Queer Kink Praxis

Queerness can’t thrive in a vacuum. Part of what I ache for in queer stories is queerness that looks like the queer cultures and communities I know, where queers are not solitary or isolated, but have webs of connection with each other. We need that, need those sorts of chosen families and activist networks and artistic communities and public sex spaces and support groups and play parties and collective houses and gatherings and potlucks.  We need each other.

I’m not only talking about finding and needing and cherishing lovers or partners or tops or submissives or tricks or poly pods or whatever you are looking for and care about romantically and/or sexually. Because while queer hookup culture and public sex spaces and dating life are important and a vital part of queer life, the kind of queerness I care about values friends and chosen family and community and comrades just as much.

I want that kind of queerness in my erotica and my love stories. Where it’s not a couple against the world, where the love interests aren’t the only queer people in the story, where love and sex and kink take place in the context of the fullness of queer life. Some of the queer erotica writers I first fell for wrote those kinds of stories: Patrick Califia, Carol Queen, C. Lee Lambert, Kate Allen, Robin Sweeney.

My queer kink erotica collection, Show Yourself To Me, is full of these kinds of stories, where characters are embedded in queer communities and families and networks, where they frequent queer spaces, especially queer public sex spaces, where they are not alone in their queerness. I care very much about telling stories like that, because they are too rare, and because they are what feels real to me.

These stories were not written in a vacuum. They have been deeply influenced by other queer writers, especially erotica writers, but also a range of other genres. They have been sparked by my experiences, fantasies, things I’ve witnessed, conversations I’ve had, in the context of queer kink community.

These stories were not written alone. I’m deeply indebted to the folks who helped shape the politic in these stories and to shape the stories themselves, from beta readers, to cherished friends, to comrades, to activists whose work I’ve read, to lovers, to editors. I did not do this alone, and could not have done it without help.

This collection is not going out in to the world with just my words and support. I have a tremendously supportive publisher in Go Deeper Press. I have a beautiful, brave, and brilliant introduction written by Annabeth Leong. I have blurbs written by activists and writers that I deeply respect, and who have had an intense impact on me as a writer and as a kinky queer person. I have a community of erotica writers and sex writers and community activists who are helping me to begin conversations about this book by participating in a blog tour.

This is the first stop on the tour. The other stops are listed below, along with more information about Show Yourself To Me, this book of my heart, that is being released tomorrow. I hope you will join in the conversations about this book that means so me. I would be glad to have your voice included.


In Show Yourself to Me: Queer Kink Erotica, Xan West introduces us to pretty boys and nervous boys, vulnerable tops and dominant sadists, good girls and fierce girls and scared little girls, mean Daddies and loving Daddies and Daddies that are terrifying in delicious ways.

Submissive queers go to alleys to suck cock, get bent over the bathroom sink by a handsome stranger, choose to face their fears, have their Daddy orchestrate a gang bang in the park, and get their dream gender-play scene—tied to a sling in an accessible dungeon.

Dominants find hope and take risks, fall hard and push edges, get fucked and devour the fear and tears that their sadist hearts desire.

Within these 24 stories, you will meet queers who build community together, who are careful about how they play with power, who care deeply about consent. You will meet trans and genderqueer folks who are hot for each other, who mentor each other, who do the kind of gender play that is only possible with other trans and genderqueer folks.

This is Show Yourself to Me. Get ready for a very wild ride.

Purchase at Go Deeper Press

Purchase on Amazon

To celebrate the release of my first solo collection of erotica, Show Yourself To Me: Queer Kink Erotica, I have organized a virtual book tour. Follow along each day in October as these wonderful folks post interviews, excerpts, my own ramblings on the book, reviews, and more!

10 thoughts on “Queer Kink Praxis

  1. Pingback: Blog Tour for Show Yourself To Me | Kink Praxis

  2. Pingback: Queer Kink Praxis (by Xan West) | Dilo Keith: Writing About Erotic Dominance & Submission

  3. Pingback: Go Deeper Press » Xan West Blog Tour Compendium 1 – Including Free Erotic Story!

  4. Pingback: Book Tour: Show Yourself to Me – Queer kink erotica – Xan West | [Jillian] Boyd Writes

  5. Pingback: Show Yourself To Me: Decolonizing Erotica, Transparency, and Accountability | kikidelovely

  6. Pingback: Jacob Louder » Blog Archive » Review: Show Yourself to Me by Xan West

  7. Pingback: Last Stop: A Guest Post by Jacob Louder | Kink Praxis

  8. Pingback: The Queer and Trans Love Stories I Need | Kink Praxis

  9. Pingback: Bisexuality and Me: One Trans Experience | Kink Praxis

  10. Pingback: Valuing the dominants consent and needs in kink negotiation | Kink Praxis

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