Why I Care About Depicting Survivors of Abusive BDSM Continuing to Do Kink

As a heads up, this post discusses abusive BDSM relationships, intimate partner violence, and sexual assault. It also discusses ableism and stigma around mental illness in kink communities, anti-kink prejudice in survivor spaces and therapeutic treatment, and kink community responses to abuse. It includes a brief reference to an abusive therapist. It includes a brief […]

Stories with Disabled Characters in Show Yourself To Me

Folks often ask about disability representation in this collection, and where to find it, so I put together this reference guide. Stories are listed in the order they appear in the collection. (MC = main character, SC = secondary character.) Missing Daddy: Main POV character (unnamed) has PTSD (briefly referenced at the beginning of the […]

#DailyCoping Strategies Round Up

I began a new project this week. Each day, on twitter, I do a series of tweets describing one of my coping strategies and talking about how it works, what it is esp useful for, where I learned about it. As storify is shutting down, I’m linking directly to the beginning of the threads. If […]

On #WorldMentalHealthDay, talking about stigma and internalized ableism

I had a conversation with my (fairly new) therapist recently. I was talking about a situation that had triggered my internalized ableism around my mental health in particular. I used the words internalized ableism. She was confused. Said she understood what internalized ableism is, but didn’t get how it applied in the situation. Turns out […]

Links of the Week 10/1/16

I am starting this up again, because I have found so many amazing things recently. Here are some of the great things I have read or listened to this past week, my recommendations to you. Two links about disability and kink: This article about disabled people’s experiences in kink community that shares perspectives from Shanna Katz Kattari, […]

Going At My Own Pace: The Impact of Rose Lemberg’s “Geometries of Belonging”

We have this saying in my chosen family of fat disabled queers: “Go at your own pace.” A saying, a reminder. To ourselves, and each other. A way of holding onto our reality, insisting it is enough. A counter to the thousand tiny and huge ways that the world insists that we are too slow, […]

Links of the week 5/18/16

Here are some of the brilliant things I have read this past week, my recommendations to you. This interview with Esmé Weijun Wang totally blew me away. So much in there about language, interracial relationships, mental illness. Really worth a read. “I chose to use English as well as Chinese in two ways: Chinese characters […]